BEING a teen is a challenging time. It is a time when you become self-conscious, feel the pressure to be like your peers, and have to 'step up' to the academic challenges that attending secondary school present.

The last thing you want to throw into the mix is anxiety!

Anxiety can be mild - a healthy dose of anxiety could be needed to get homework in on time, for example. But the problem occurs when anxiety tips over into affecting everyday life.

Physically your teen might be feeling panicky with heart racing, sweaty palms, a feeling that they can't breathe and an overwhelming urge to remove themselves from a place or situation.

Emotionally your teen may feel scared of attending certain places, being with certain people and may start to avoid certain situations. This might manifest itself with tearfulness, anger and OCD-type behaviour, and it is not unusual to feel you are going mad with these intense feelings.

If your teen is suffering from anxiety, a very gentle and supportive approach is essential from parents and family members. Advice like "you will have to snap out of it" or "why are you acting like this, you're young, you have the world at your feet" will not be at all helpful. In fact they will make your child feel more isolated and desperately unhappy.

My advice is to listen, listen and listen again. The car is a great place to talk as you are busy driving and the focus isn't completely on your child. Your teen may find it hard to articulate the exact way they are feeling, and may just present as having many worries.

Talk to them about how they would like to feel and discuss how they might reach that place. Don’t hesitate to seek advice and guidance from your GP and school if your teen is struggling with anxiety.

See: www.parentandbabycoach.co.uk

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